Feeling lost and directionless is a common struggle, and it's often accompanied by the belief that we need to 'find' our purpose. But here's the twist: your purpose isn't something you discover; it's something you create and cultivate.
Throughout history, from ancient scriptures to modern philosophy, the concept of purpose has been revered. It's seen as a guiding force, a reason for being, and a way to connect with something greater than ourselves. Viktor Frankl, a survivor of Nazi concentration camps, profoundly influenced our understanding of purpose with his book, 'Man's Search for Meaning.' He wrote about the importance of finding purpose, especially in the face of adversity.
However, the contemporary focus on 'finding' purpose might be doing more harm than good. It creates an expectation that purpose is something external and elusive, which can lead to frustration and anxiety.
But what if we approached purpose differently? What if, instead of searching, we recognized that purpose is something we form and shape?
The Problem with 'Finding' Purpose
Seeing purpose as something to 'find' can lead to several issues:
- It implies a lack, which can breed anxiety.
- It suggests that purpose should be a sudden, crystal-clear revelation, which can be disheartening when it doesn't happen.
- It makes purpose seem fixed and unchanging, leading to a conservative mindset.
- It often presents purpose as a means to an end, especially in a capitalist context, where purpose is co-opted for monetary gain.
Forming Purpose: A Different Perspective
When we think of purpose as something we form, it shifts our mindset. It encourages us to work with what we already have - our interests, passions, and activities that bring us vitality. Purpose is not something distant and elusive; it's right here, waiting to be nurtured.
The Benefits of 'Forming' Purpose
- It fosters a sense of abundance, allowing us to work with what we have.
- It recognizes purpose as a process, a work in progress, which helps manage feelings of frustration.
- It embraces the idea that purpose evolves, adapting to our changing world and priorities.
- It emphasizes that purpose is autotelic, a reward in itself, not dependent on external incentives.
Practical Steps: 'A Day on Purpose'
One exercise I use with clients is 'A Day on Purpose.' It involves imagining a day free from mundane tasks, where you can engage in activities that are meaningful and connect you to the world.
For example, Frank, a client in his mid-30s, wanted to spend a day reconnecting with nature, away from his busy work life. He recognized that this would help him feel reinvigorated and connected to the bigger picture. He hoped it would positively influence his son, teaching him the value of nature and adventure.
Making Purpose a Priority
Forming purpose requires deliberate action. It's about creating opportunities for cultivation and growth, not waiting for a sudden revelation. It involves thinking specifically about what brings meaning and vitality to our lives and taking concrete steps to make those activities a regular part of our routine.
So, are you ready to start forming your purpose? What activities or interests might be the seeds of your purpose? And how can you make time for them in your life?
